Do you know Pauline?

Pauline was born in a small beautiful country, full of life and colors, laughs and love, friendly people… A place called the land of the eternal spring… Guatemala!

Her mom divorced her dad when she was 7. Later at 10, she lost her dad in a motorcycle accident and her mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer at 11. Pauline has a brother 12 years older but based on circumstances he was raised with dad and she by her mom. She took care of her mom for 7 years after the diagnosis. Her mom was a fighter, an angel and a true hero that didn’t let the cancer bring her down; she knew couldn’t leave Pauline alone before she turned into an adult. She finally gave up once Pauline turned 18. She was ready and Pauline was ready to let her go.

Many lonely nights ahead hit her. So many different hard moments as well. Some days she felt no hope and some others like not waking up. She kept walking through her journey even if she didn’t know what was ahead. With every single task, she was transformed. She believed in herself and never gave up. She had a dream, to be as good as her mom.

Many angels crossed her path and held a hand to her. As they came, they left but made Pauline stronger, wiser, and better. They taught her so many lessons of love.

Pauline left her country in 2012 believing again in her gut. She left friends that turned into family, her status, her memories, her roots, her dignity and even identity. She came to the US and was just one more added to the  bunch. No one knew her, she was lost. She came here to marry the man of her dreams. The one that will finally give her stability and peace, the ones she never had before.  She kept struggling to find her new identity or path. Her place in society.

She hit bottom when she sunk into a depression after having her second child. She gained weight and lost any interest. She felt like nobody could see what she really was.

One morning, her mom’s words hit her head over and over pushing her to come to life. She once again stood up to face the world. Starting this new journey, convinced she wasn’t only going to save herself but many others along the way. She started training and losing pounds. It sounds superficial but it is what it is. She set her first goal for 3 months and pushed until she accomplished it. She keeps pushing and setting goals. She doesn’t know where she is going or what she is working hard for but she knows she will end up were she needs to.

Pauline is very sensitive. She loves to be loved. She loves to laugh. She loves to joke. She loves to share happiness. She loves to make people smile and keep them company. She loves to cheer people up. She is simple, easy going, and down to earth . She is human so she has personality and character, a strong will with it. She can get angry and get hurt easily. She still will stand up and help others do the same; and to fight with her. Beware because Pauline is a fighter so you better want to fight. After all we are together in this world to help others, if not then what is our purpose in this world?

Now, if you believed you couldn’t now you should… We become what we believe so act now!

I know I still have a lot to learn from others. I believe my goals and dreams may be different than what destiny has for me. I stand up and fight. Let life take me. Be yourself and enjoy the ride!

How the journey started!

How did I really get so inspired by doing this fitness madness?

When I came to the US almost 5 years ago for love I left a lot behind including my dignity. I fell in a deep depression and started to be very negative about my surroundings. I gained 30 pounds way after my little one was born from the depression of feeling lonely and having no identity of my own. Kept making excuses that I never had time to train and loved to eat.

One day I woke up and realized how unhappy I was making myself with all this. Not only the ones around me didn’t find me attractive but I was hating myself. I said enough and started a new journey but this time was going to be a journey to transform myself forever.

Sometimes the people you love the most make you feel the worst without even realizing it. It is sad and sounds stupid to stay with them but you never leave anyone struggling behind don’t you? everything that happens is always for a reason. I felt since I came here that some people see me in a low position just because they don’t know me well and never make time to want to know me (years and experience change people but some don’t seem to realize). Those are the same that push me to be better so I could show them I can be whoever I want to be in a Country I still don’t own a space in (yet). I had a vision to rebuild my name into an empire. Hasn’t been easy and takes a lot of effort and people on the way to get thru. Life hasn’t been easy, nor do I expect it to be either and I will NOT give up. Stubborn does what stubborn wants and stubborn gets it!

Living in Portland, nearly 5 years later, I’m finally experiencing a new enlightenment. It took living in 4 different states to finally feel at home so far from Guatemala where I lived most of my life. It’s taken me 6 days of training hard at the gym and not giving up for any reason. Changed my eating habits around what I love to do which is the gym. Have been reading, researching and studying most of this time and practicing on me. So far I want to certify myself as a personal trainer and just started doing fitness modeling. That doesn’t sound bad right?

I wake up some days so frustrated or sad. Things sometimes don’t go the way they should. I keep thanking every person that encouraged me along the way. If it was not for the way they treated me I wouldn’t be doing what I love the most. I keep thanking the ones that have supported me and believed in me even when I didn’t and are still by my side. I thank the person that I admire the most in this new journey.. If it wasn’t for those words I hear the first time we met, I probably wouldn’t have come so far! Those words were: “You just never stop!”

So life is life and we just have to learn to get the best out of it because we only have one. Be happy… Happiness is in you and not around you! Believe in yourself and push yourself beyond limits… Trust me, you can do it! Don’t expect anything from others but be grateful for the ones that help you climb the ladder…. There will be always a couple that will help without you asking. Open your senses and observe or you might lose them! Always remember who helped you stay strong, push you up and never let you down. I guess those are the rules I live for because I believe in Karma.

Photo by Todd Siechen Photography